Sessions with Sue 20

This session was yesterday, another deviation from our regular Friday. We mostly talked about artistry, my future and of course, my dad.

• "A Night of Poetry" and what I learned
•  Ebony Stewart's advice about being true to yourself and owning up to you being a human being who's still working through stuff... people will dig that, will feel and respond to that. And even if they don't, what's more is that it makes your work more genuine and authentic
• Song and poetry are linked; adapt the poet's strategy to performing; maybe I can't fully get with the idea of performing/entertaining in terms of putting on a show to impress people, but I could get with the idea of telling and sharing stories; and that way even te largest arena can be made an intimate space
•  You could always be reading/studying/doing something "productive"; but it's important for you to take time to do enjoyable and fun things anyway
• On career prospects; Sue was trying to think of how she could help me see that there's something out there for me; recommends Indeed.com
• Sue: You'll end up with more options and possibilities than you'll know what to do with; I see you as incredibly capable and talented young woman with so much potential, yet has so many doubts about what's ahead of her
• gotta own who you are, especially the good parts; and no one can give you that, you have to grow into that
• experiences like going to Japan and France grew you in ways that just being at school couldn't; going off somewhere new after you graduate (as opposed to just going home) could be good for you in the same way
• Still not talking to Dad; even if you do decide to not have anything to do with him anymore for now; leave a small window open in case you change your mind down the line
• About your dad being afraid toward you/not knowing what to do or say, how to act around you
• Maybe he assumed or was to scared that he'd fumble, mess up, not do things right/perfectly that he decided to not do anything at all? Distanced and eventually removed himself from the ewuation before he could fail (which he did anyway)? [Me: sound familiar?]
• Worried about doing or saying the right things when all he had to do was be there
• Dad's so caught up in how he feels and his discomfort toward difficult situations that he can't see anything else [Me: sound familiar?]
• Being able to take your child's resentment/acting out/hurtful words or behavior and still move toward them and say "I love you anyway"; that's a courage in parenting that Ma seemed to have but Dad didn't and still doesn't