Memories, Movement

(Or, "More Unnecessary Things That I Remember While Driving, Walking, or Trying to Fall Asleep")

That one time in college when I was chatting with my friend Esse, and she stated that twerking was an art form, and I guffawed. Like, almost indignantly. Since then I've seen how the girls do it in Atlanta, I've taken twerk and pole dance classes from a Detroit native who used to be a stripper. Twerking is indeed an art form.

That one time during gym class in kindergarten (first grade?) when one of my white classmates and I were staring at each other's hands, and she came to the conclusion that we're probably all white at our core, since all of our palms are white. That classmate is a left-leaning anthropologist now and would be mortified by such a racially-biased suggestion, but at the time her kindergarten self really thought she'd hit on something.

That one time I sang a couple songs at a jazz jam session in Detroit and a stud bought me a drink to express her appreciation for my performance. Conveniently it was a glass of white wine, one of  the few alcoholic beverages I do drink. 

Memories, Movement

(Or, "More Unnecessary Things That I Remember While Driving, Walking, or Trying to Fall Asleep")

That one time in 2nd grade when we were discussing the Gore-Bush presidential race in class, and the teaching assistant/Kids Club lady named Geri (Jeri? Jerri? Gerrie?) told me I'd probably be a Republican. Oh, if only I'd understood what she meant and knew how to use my eyeroll to its fullest potential at that age...

That one time I was waiting to checkout at Rite Aid and ran into the Kids Club lady from when I was in 5th and 6th grade. Ms. Linda. She asked me what I was up to now and seemed to approve, "I always knew you were one of the good ones." (This happened just last week.)

Memories, Movement

(Or, "More Unnecessary Things That I Remember While Driving, Walking, or Trying to Fall Asleep")

That one time during my summer in Paris when I went to go get my Carte Navigo, and when I presented my photo the attendant looked at it and told me I was beautiful. Or, in her words, "Byew-tee-fuhl!"

That one time when I visited a church and got to the sanctuary too early before service. Sat in on a Sunday school class lead by a black auntie who claimed that Kim Davis was a hero whose actions aligned with God's Word. Never went back.

That one time I had to explain black hair, perms, going natural, transitioning, and the "big chop" to a former high school classmate who'd asked me how her friend could "get her daughter's beautiful curls back". Said former classmate was white. Her friend was white with a half-black child, and had apparently chemically straightened her daughter's hair without doing the necessary research.

That one time in church when the pastor had all of us stand and hold hands in prayer, and while holding the hand of the guy next to me his girlfriend inserted herself in between us, so the dude and I were awkwardly holding hands behind her back (literally!).

Memories, Movement

(Or, "Unnecessary Things That I Remember While Driving, Walking, or Trying to Fall Asleep")

That one time in college when I was at self-checkout at the grocery store with my hair wrapped in a scarf, and a white teenybopper tried to pay me to run her items with mine so she wouldn't have to wait in line.

That one time I went to the pediatrician, but randomly a different doctor was there this time, and she warned me to take my adrenal medication regularly, otherwise I might not be able to have children later on.

That one time in elementary school when I was a huge Destiny's Child fan, and I asked the roller rink DJ to play "Apple Pie a la Mode" and he said he'd see what he could do. Stayed until the rink closed that day, and he never played the song.