Every time I really want to do something, I'm extremely excited about the idea at first. Then when the time comes, I get nervous (or frightened) and say that I don't want to do it, that I don't think I'm ready, that I'm not cut out for it, etc. One thing I can say about myself, however, is that I always go through with it. If it's something I've set my heart on doing I never chicken out, even when I really want to, which is most of the time.
Doing or getting something you've always wanted is exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. I've wanted to go to Japan for 6 years now, and there's no way I'm not getting on that plane next week. But I have a hard time adjusting to changes, and because I don't know what to expect, I'm not sure how I'll handle all the change and newness that will come with this experience.
My best friend called me today and said, "You know, this is only the beginning. After this you'll go on many trips to all kinds of different places, and it won't even make you nervous because you'll be used to it. You won't even have to think about it." I know that I'll get to that point eventually. And I know in my head that I'll be okay this time around, because I always end up okay. I guess I'm just... being myself. Same old habit of nervousness. Happens every time.